Back when I practiced law, it had been drummed into my head that every mistake was a potential catastrophe and a source of shame. I was a perfectionist and proud of it. I was also a little bit intense and not particularly healthy. I taught my Associates and Law Clerks to be just like me!
Before you read this story, I should let you know that this is a sad story which does not end well.
Long ago I had a great professional relationship and friendship with Laurence. I liked Laurence a lot. He was honest and ethical. He cared about his clients, his family, and his relationships. He taught me valuable lessons about dealing with clients and co-workers.
Long ago I used to work with a great lawyer named Ed. Ed was calm, at least compared to me. When I was freaking out about my files and my workload and certain that I was going to get myself sued for something or other, Ed just did his work, calmly and professionally, no matter how much pressure he was under. We used to call Ed the Iceman because we were sure that he had ice water in his veins. I envied Ed. I never did find out if his insides were any different from his outsides.
In the movie Cowboys and Aliens, the cowboys band together to vanquish the big, bad, powerful aliens.
When I retired, I moved to the country and tried to fit in with the country folks after having spent a lifetime in the Big City.
There is an old story about a fellow who was searching for his lost keys under a streetlight. Various people came over to him, asked what he was looking for, and joined in the search. Eventually a lawyer came by and asked the same question but then followed up and asked him where he had lost his keys. The fellow pointed to a dark corner. When the lawyer asked why he was looking for his keys over here if he had lost them over there, the fellow explained that it was too dark to find anything where he lost them.
I am on a fifty-five day segment of a one hundred and eleven day geriatric world cruise. That is not the official title – the cruise line just calls it a ‘world cruise.’ But if you think about who can afford the time and money to be on vacation for that length of time, you can see why the average age of the cruisers is high enough to make me, at 68 years old, one of the youngsters.
You may have heard the story about the flight attendant who assisted an elderly gentleman by giving him a pillow and a blanket, and then asked him if he was comfortable. The man replied, “I make a living.”
When I was young, my parents were not comfortable, but they insisted that I obtain a university education. They expected me to earn whatever I could in the summer to fund my education, and they agreed to cover the balance. Luckily, this was back in the days when university and law school were affordable in Canada.
I am on a cruise. A few days ago I was doing the tourist thing in Kauai, by which I mean that I was on a bus being driven around to see the sites and the sights.
The driver was an older gentleman who invited us to call him “Uncle Willie.” Uncle Willie gave us a great tour. He was friendly and knowledgeable and we had an excellent day. Especially compared to a day spent practicing law, or worse, attending a partner’s retreat.
I keep reading about mental health issues in the legal profession. Too many lawyers are terminally unhappy. The problem appears to be impossible to fix. Even The Washington Post just ran an article titled, “Want to be happy? Then don’t be a lawyer.”
Some years ago my firm had a lawyer’s retreat. We invited a speaker who gave a philosophical presentation about being mindful about how you use your time. His theme was that you have to constantly ask yourself, “what is the best use of my time right now?”