Here is a version of a departure announcement that a lawyer recently posted on LinkedIn, which I have rewritten slightly to recast it as if he were getting divorced:
“After three years of growth, learning and development with my excellent wife, today I close out an important and rewarding chapter in my life.
I am truly grateful for the opportunities I have had and experience I have gained with my wife and her family, who have helped make this portion of my journey so impactful. I leave this marriage a better person than when I met my wife, and that is solely a result of her and her fantastic family and friends who I had the pleasure to interact with over my time in this wonderful marriage.
While it is never easy to say goodbye to an amazing family, I am excited for my next chapter and the challenges that lie ahead.
I eagerly look forward to announcing my next domestic adventure shortly. Stay tuned.”
If the departing lawyer is sincere, I am hard-pressed to imagine for what possible reason he might be leaving his firm.
Or maybe “he doth protest too much,” and his experience was not as awe-inspiring as he has tried to convey.
And what is with the “cliffhanger” that hints at a great future but never says what the person is going to be doing next?
It might be that the delighted departing lawyer has no idea where he is going, in which case he was either fired or so miserable or underpaid that he quit. That would make his whole announcement disingenuous.
More likely, he has a much better situation waiting for him, but he did not want to include that in the divorce announcement, because it would make his cheery goodbye look insincere.
I understand that well-brought-up young lawyers might believe “that if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” But these happy-go-lucky lawyers are skipping merrily out of their firms saying wonderful things, so there must be more to it. Perhaps it has to do with not burning bridges.
Personally, I think that it is yet another example of people following the current flavour of the month spit out by AI. To test that theory, I asked ChatGPT to draft a departure notice for a third-year lawyer. It read much like this lawyer’s announcement, and included the following:
“After three incredible years at [law firm name], it’s time for my next chapter.
Reflecting on my time here, I am deeply grateful for the opportunities, challenges and growth I’ve experienced. Over the past three years, I’ve had the privilege of working alongside exceptionally talented colleagues, tackling complex legal matters and advocating for wonderful clients.
A huge thank you to my mentors, partners and team members who guided, challenged and supported me along the way. The lessons learned and relationships built here will undoubtedly shape the rest of my career.
Stay tuned for updates on what’s next!”
Am I the only one who is not buying this bunch of malarkey?
This article was originally published by Law360 Canada, part of LexisNexis Canada Inc